Old Jokes

"YOU CALL YOURSELF A: HARD DRIVE? I'VE SEEN TOASTERS BIGGER THAN YOU! NOW DOWNLOAD AND GIVE ME TWENTY!" =P







Why did the geek turn on his computer on a hot day?
-He wanted to open the Windows.

Why did the geek take up photography?
-He wanted his own dork room. =)

Why couldn't the geek type on his computer?
-He lost his keys.

Why did they boy give his teacher a PC?
-The store was out of apples.

What part of the keyboard do astronauts like best?
-The space bar. =P

The queen was having problems retrieving a document from her computer. She called all her ministers into the throne room and asked them what she should do. They went away and debated for hours and hours. Finally, the ministers came up with a solution and dispatched messengers to all four points of the kingdom. These gathered every citizen they could find and brought them all to the castle. The proud ministers made all the women, men, children, and babes in arms stand in a long line and presented them to the queen. "What was the meaning of this?" the irate monarch demanded. "why,"
her chief minister responded, "we thought you were looking for a single file!"

How did the computer feel after it's memory had been upgraded?
-Chipper.

How did the computer buy a new car?
-They all chipped in.

What do you get when you cross a bunny rabbit with the world wide web?
-A hare Net.

What kind of cola do keyboards like?
-Tab.

Why did the geek attach his computer to a fishing rod?
-Someone told him to hook it up.

How do you keep a nerd in suspense?
-I'll tell you later.

Why don't computers eat anything?
-They don't like what's on their menu.

How are computers like school hallways?
-They both have monitors.

Why did the disk drive become a professional goalie?
-it kept making great saves.

Why did the microprocessor always write form letters?
-It was an impersonal computer.

How do you find a spider on the internet?
-Check out his Web site.

Why shouldn't you take your computer into rush-hour traffic?
-Because it might crash.

How can you tell when a fairy has been using your computer?
-Pixel dust.

Did you hear about the computer with the corrupt hard drive?
-It's backup was worse than its byte.

Why didn't the computer go to the prom?
-She didn't have a data.

What do you call a computer that only types in uppercase?
-Shifty.

Why did the IBM and Apple computers get a divorce?
-They weren't compatible.

How are computers like spies?
-They both work in code.

Who does a baby computer cry for when she's upset?
-Her motherboard.

Where all delinquent disk drive sent?
-To boot camp.